THE SUMMONER’S HERALD
A Special Report Concerning Recent Renovations To That Most Illustrious Field Of Justice, SUMMONER’S RIFT
by Summoner Nyxana Du Samme, Staff Reporter
Summoner’s Rift, THE INSTITUTE OF WAR—High Councilor Kolminye cast the spell that consumed the prior enchantments that lay over Summoner’s Rift and brought to life the new Field, engineered over many months by the League’s finest geomancers, illusionists, and (of course) a whole slew of thaumabotanists. Meanwhile, Summoners from the most illustrious Riotous Fists Clan were on hand (as one inclined to wordplay might put it) to hand out commemorative medallions forged by Doran himself, while the much-adored young inventor looked on.
High Councilor Kolminye delivered the keynote address, acknowledging the unfortunate aftermath of the Battle of Shurima but firmly reminding the audience that peace had returned to Valoran, and that even now, Champions and Summoners were exploring the new land of Nyroth. She lauded Bilgewater for its heroic and selfless acts on behalf of the people of Avalon and Emain Ablach, and the Freljord for its astonishing discovery of a second yordle civilization on the isle of Argyre. She remarked that it is well that the unveiling of the new Summoner’s Rift should coincide with the adjudication of the many questions posed by the discovery of Nyroth, as the League of Legends embraces the task of standing guard over Nyroth as well as Valoran. She added that a convoy of ships had returned from Nyroth, bearing some remarkable gemstones from Argyre as well as some curious trinkets purchased from the Nyrothians, and that several of these would be sold at a charity auction conducted by Summoner Maevis Pas, with half of all proceeds going to assist victims of the Black Mist, in accordance with a recent motion sponsored by Nami.
Summoners from the Riotous Fists Clan then led select Champions and Summoners on a foot tour of the new Rift, with the audience filling the stands watching trans aetherea as the splendid new grounds were described. Summoner Lu Bu, the Summoner-Chef in charge of the menu for the luncheon that followed, accompanied the tour with a tiered lacquer box of baked treats he had prepared himself, with which he enticed the field’s diverse fauna to approach. The antler mice seemed especially numerous today, at one point quite amusingly perching on his shoulders. He added that he’d wanted to put smoked antler-mouse bacon on the lunch menu, but that this had been vetoed by the Rift’s groundskeepers. (There was some question as to the seriousness of Summoner Lu Bu’s comments; this reporter has independently confirmed their veracity through a confidential source.) The arrival of the ferocious new dragon drew astonished gasps from the audience, while Baron Nashor’s emergence was met by awestruck silence. Summoner Lu Bu broke that silence with a a remark that, “Now I get why they pay you Champions so much,” which broke the silence with a wave of uneasy laughter.
Although the unveiling went off without a hitch, some had warned that altering the magical framework of so powerful a thaumascape as the Rift’s could have unforeseen effects, even though the changes were primarily “cosmetic”. Due precautions were taken, and they turned out to be well-warranted when an overcharged Ancient Golem construct broke free of the old Rift’s framework and charged the stands. Its advance was stopped by two quick-thinking Summoners: the one known as “Heavy”, a Rune Wars veteran, and Chimalpopica, a reanimated Zaunite and a patient of Professor Stanwick Pididly. While Summoner H.W. Guy (“Heavy”) slam-tackled the golem and unbalanced it, Summoner Chimalpopica pelted it with augmented bolt-cannon shots. The hulking brute flung the Summoners aside—specifically, this reporter recalls, throwing “Heavy” into Chimalpopica—but they had bought enough time for a rescue, as the famed (though oft-censured) Champion Vi charged into the fray and floored the rogue golem with one techmaturgic punch. The festivities continued after a team of Summoners confirmed that the rest of the “rigging” was fully secure.
The Herald looks forward to bringing you further information on this remarkable unveiling soon. But as for now, this Summoner is herself being “summoned” for a match on the new Fields!
18 November, 24 CLE.